Just when
you thought you'd seen the last of me, Khyron returns for 2008!
2007...what a piece of crap. Yeah, you heard me. 2007 sucked the big one.
From things in my personal life to developments in the entertainment and esoteric
medias, it was 365 days of disappointments on top of let downs. Get your
beating sticks, it's paddling time.
I'm sure you all are as sick of 2007 retrospectives as I am, but guess what?
It's time for another one...
I honestly can't think of a worse year for me than 2007. My life played out
like a checklist to some depressing country western song. Thank God I don't
own a pickup truck, because odds are that it would have broken down.
So let us see then what the stars had predicted for us. Your standard
horoscope is pretty lame, so I'm really more of a numerology guy. Numerology
is great because it makes you feel both smart and spiritual. The sense of
accomplishment you get from calculating some simple addition in your head and
using it to predict your life is infinitely better than just reading some
vaguely written horoscope.
2007. 2 + 0 + 0 + 7 = 9. That's how it's done, right? Well in any case, a
Google search of "2007 numerology" tells us that a '9' year is one
of extremes of personal growth and change. Moreover, those with a 'life path'
of a 9 (which would be myself) were predicted to have a challenging year
filled with health issues and major lifestyle changes. You know, I was
looking forward to ripping numerology to shreds tonight...but the more I
think of it, the predictions were pretty much on the money.
Moving on.
As was made clear in both Art Bell's annual Coast to Coast AM
predictions show as well as Ian Punnett's follow-up 'professional' psychic
roundup, the usual suspects in the world of prognostication were about as
accurate as ever. Which is to say not very. As was to be expected, vagueness
won out with the help of sure bets such as "economic problems" and
"strange weather". Unfortunately we didn't get a repeat on-air
meltdown like Sylvia Brown's now infamous 'Minergate' debacle.
So what else went down, then? The so-called 'drone' UFO was probably the
standout story in the world of esoterica. Although it turned out to be
nothing more than a chance for Linda Moulton Howe to stay busy and may or may
not have been part of a Halo 3 viral ad campaign. Then of course
everyone was buzzing about the vanishing bees for a while, but I guess they
worked out their problems on their own because I just ate myself some
delicious fruit not but a few minutes ago.
I covered the fall TV lineup to some extent, but ultimately it too proved to
be a disappointment. Heroes' second season was a pretty big drop in
quality compared to its stellar first, Bionic Woman was unwatchably
bad, and Flash Gordon was an altogether failure. To make things worse,
my two favorite new shows, Journeyman and Cavemen, were both
canceled before being fully realized. At least Battlestar Galactica Razor
was able to deliver, if not leaving me utterly anxious for the full season.
But then of course that writers strike put the kibosh on my TV viewership.
The silver screen releases were likewise hit and miss. There were a few
gems--such as Sunshine, Grindhouse, The Bourne Ultimatum, and No
Country for Old Men--but a slew of hyped up summer blockbusters bombed
big. Bruce Willis in Live Free or Die Hard, for instance, left a sour
taste in my mouth I thought not possible from a Die Hard flick. Also
Michael Bay's Transformers was entirely forgettable.
In the world of The K-Files, my overlord Tim Binnall informs me that I
managed to BS my way through 43 new columns in 2007. I'm confident 13 or so
were probably read. So for those that took the time to do so, I offer you my
gratitude and sincere apologies. 2007 also saw the start of tragically
ignored Movie Loft reviews. Stay tuned on that front, as I hope to start
pumping them out on a more regular basis soon.
Alright, that about does it for me this week. I've wasted enough time as it
is on this poor excuse for a year. So strap up and get ready for a whole new
year of The K-Files.
